Pride in Your People (Even If You’re Struggling With Your Country)

July can be a weird month when you're queer in the U.S.

Fireworks go off. Flags are everywhere. There’s a lot of talk about freedom, liberty, and American pride. But for many of us—especially if you're LGBTQIA+, BIPOC, neurodivergent, disabled, an immigrant, or living at the intersections—those words ring hollow.

Because what does freedom mean when lawmakers are trying to control your body?
What does liberty mean when your identity is up for debate?
What does "equal under the law" mean when safety and access are so uneven?

You’re not ungrateful for feeling that dissonance. You’re paying attention.

It’s okay if you’re not in the mood to wave a flag right now.
It’s okay if “proud to be an American” doesn’t land for you this year—or ever.
That doesn’t mean you’re cynical or broken. It just means you’re honest.

And here's the thing: you can still have pride.

Pride in your friends who show up even when they’re tired.
Pride in the queer kid in your town who just came out, even when it wasn’t safe.
Pride in the mutual aid group making sure people eat.
Pride in your community, your chosen family, your resilience, your rage.
Pride in surviving.
Pride in healing.
Pride in staying soft in a country that keeps demanding hardness.

National identity is complicated. And it’s okay to hold love for your community instead of—or in place of—love for your country. You get to define where your loyalty lives. You get to choose what pride looks like.

As a queer-affirming therapist, I hold space for a lot of that complexity. I work with adults across Ohio and Massachusetts who are carrying the weight of political burnout, social disconnection, and identity stress—especially in moments like this, when the culture tells us to celebrate a version of freedom that doesn’t always include us.

If you’re feeling out of sync with the national mood, you’re not alone. And you don’t have to figure out how to navigate it all by yourself. If therapy feels like the next right place to land, you can schedule a free phone consult at www.dryadcounseling.as.me/phoneconsult.

You don’t have to feel pride in your country to feel pride in yourself.
Your people are worth showing up for.
You are worth showing up for.
And that’s more than patriotic—it’s powerful.